Life Line Markers

Morning had already broken by the time I made it to the sun room this morning.  I felt as if I had walked into the middle of an orchestra performance.  Although, still beautiful, a little sad to have missed the beginning.  The birds were singing and flitting here and there and the squirrels were playing and chasing each other, dogs were barking and a woodpecker was pecking wood out in the greenbelt somewhere nearby.  I could hear a commercial nail-gun hammering somewhere in the neighborhood, someone is getting a new roof.  Sirens were whining in the distance, the fire department is only about a mile away.  Oh my, the world around me was busy while I sat and enjoyed my coffee.    

My eyes travel over the backyard and I notice a large limb has fallen from one of the trees near the back fence that will need to be cleaned up.  My yellow daffodils are blooming along the back fence line.  My brother Robbie planted those for me the summer before Mom got sick.  Isn’t it strange how we measure time?  The summer before she was sick; and the years after she died.  When something either wonderful or devastating happens in our lives it becomes a marker for us to measure time.  I have a lot of markers in my life:  some of the happiest memories, but also some of the most heart-wrenchingly sad.  Our life line, made up of happy and sad, maybe scary or exciting … those are our markers with all the every days in between.  The everyday is what keeps us going.  It’s the smiles we receive from strangers that we pass on to other strangers.  It’s the sound of a baby’s laugh, the song of a bird, the sound of children playing or the gurgle of a creek as you sit beside it to read a book.  Those days may not be marker days on our lifeline but they are days we can enjoy.  Today I missed my quiet time but I enjoyed my nature performance.  The quiet will be there tomorrow as it was yesterday but today was for joy and laughter and bustle. 

I woke today thinking of Grandma.  There are days, like today, where I miss her so much it’s like a hollow ache in my heart.  I just can’t fill it no matter what I do.  If I could grow up to be like anyone in the world it would be my grandma.  She loved.  I cannot imagine any other way to better describe her than that, she loved.  She was patient, she was kind.  She loved.  It didn’t matter if you were born to her or not, she loved.  She didn’t judge, she loved.  If you showed up at her door unannounced, she was surprised and excited to see you.  She gave the best hugs.  I can still hear her laughter.  I can still see all the photo albums, she had so many, she was so proud of her family.  She had nine sons and three daughters that lived to adulthood and many, many grandchildren.  I think we all felt we were her favorites because she made us feel that way.  She made each and every one of us feel special.  She loved.  I miss you Grandma!